time you used to be a chaotic bastard

My recent woes are to woe me no mo as I’ve come to realize my old foe Time, whom has certainly robbed itself from me over the pages of this blog, in both consumption of it but also in me calling it out for being a giant unending qualm, is no longer a foe. 

Smoke from the Washburn/Mariposa Grove fire in Yosemite NP last month.

What I’m coming to realize, again, is the overriding nature of it all (seconds) and how these little paths we’re on are directed by time and that everything is a product of it and that really I can just deem time responsible for everything and everyone and I needn’t worry about anything ever again because time’s got my back, sure it’s gonna kill me but most of my favourite shit can do that – and unlike that shit, time motivates me. Being eaten alive by a grizzly while still trying to get out of my bivy does not motivate me, luckily the motivators for putting myself on the menu faaaar outweigh my concerns of becoming a bear burrito.

Mt Rundle and the town of Banff.

What I must concern myself with is forgetting any demur I may hold relating to time because embracing it’s relentlessness is probably the only positive forward step for me at this stage, having just stepped out of an epoch spanning almost a quarter of my waking life.  It’s not about using time to distance myself from said epoch, it’s about using time to usher in the next one and that’s actually a super easy task because at this point its inevitable, even if nearing epochalypse levels. 

A Sister or two.

What isn’t inevitable is how I embrace the next one, knowing full well I have no idea or sense of scope or longevity.  Forgetting the future is to once again be at the forefront of my psyche as it was how I transitioned between the most recent epochs and although the latter was born out of a loss of self/terrible decisions I’m hoping this one, given that it is not spurred on by such detriment, is going to land right where I want it.

Maragua Trail, Bolivia.

Shit went down, the future is bright – that’s what the previous paragraphs iterated.  It sounds simple, its probably gonna be simple, I just need to keep listening to my favourite songs on repeat while I hasten the shift by pedalling until I can’t pedal no more.

Baker Dam, Joshua Tree NP.

I found this in a deeeeeep chrome bookmark folder – judging from the comment i wrote 12 years ago and that period being an epochal interim (prior but similar to as aforementioned) I’ve little surprise about the intense oof/argh I get from it. But the era in which I first found this soon gave way to bliss so I figure history is gonna repeat itself nicely here, minus the distance chaos that seems to plague me.

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the espresso paradox considers the point where the espresso’s speed benefits result in a longer completion time than if one had not spent time acquiring and consuming the espresso in the first place.  this point is mostly controlled by one’s desire to consume the espresso, not the resulting time gains.  

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